When I wrote about all the cool details we became aware of after we got Teddy, I forgot one, and I think it’s worth mentioning, especially in light of Mike’s journey to embracing adoptive fatherhood. During the four-and-a-half months we were waiting (not long, in hindsight), our social worker emailed us several times with details of various expectant women who were interested in making an adoption plan, asking us if we wanted to have our photo album included in the pool for their consideration. We received one such email on September 23. After reading it, Mike said, “This one’s ours. I don’t know why, but I really think this one’s ours.”
I didn’t have such a deep conviction, but I did get a little chill when I read that the baby was due on October 9, which is our anniversary. So we quickly replied to our social worker that we were indeed interested in being considered by this birth mother. We spent the week drumming our fingers and waiting, wondering, could this be the one? Would we be parents in a matter of weeks? Finally, Monday arrived, along with an email from our social worker: the mother had decided to move forward with another couple. I was disappointed, but Mike was frustrated and confused. This one had felt so right. What happened?
Fast forward a few weeks. We get another email, this one telling us about a perfectly healthy baby boy who was ours to take home if we were interested. No need to have our photo album considered; the mother’s rights had expired and she’d simply requested her baby be placed with the longest waiting family. We weren’t given a ton of information about him or his birth family, but naturally, our social worker did provide his birth date: September 23. Mike had a feeling about Teddy before he even knew he existed.